Monday, May 16, 2005

Facing a faith crisis when you're not losing your faith

I am going through a bit of a faith crisis...but I'm not losing my faith. It's not possible, I don't think, because Jesus is as close to me as my own breath.

Psalm 139
7 Where can I go from your Spirit?
       Where can I flee from your presence?

    8 If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
       if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.

    9 If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
       if I settle on the far side of the sea,

    10 even there your hand will guide me,
       your right hand will hold me fast.

The Lord has seen me through difficult times, through deep suffering, and into joy that is not dependent on circumstances. He is ever with me. Always. Forever. I am His.

My "faith crisis" has more to do with my growth and my questioning of American cultural Christianity--not my questioning of the Father, Son & Holy Spirit. Reading Brian McLaren has really rocked my world. Entering the blogosphere and reading emerging blogs has helped me to articulate so much that has been under the surface. Finding sisters on a similar journey has been phenomenal. Listening to the voices of people I agree with and disagree with has broadened my sense of mission. Bouncing my thoughts into the world via my blog and entering into interesting discussions has been stimulating. And through it all I have my own sensible, spiritual, discerning friend--my husband-- to keep me grounded.

All this to say that everything in my life is in question except for that which is most important--God, husband, kids and stepping out in faith that God will direct me to minister for Him. In fact, because of my deep faith in Jesus, my Lord, I feel safe to question everything else.

(Note to self: Get ready, Micah Girl, it's going to be quite a ride!)


Blogger Ella's Dad said...

Good luck on your journey. Intellectual Honesty: the only way to fly.

God Bless.

8:25 AM  

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