Thursday, October 28, 2004

Election Day & the Red Sox

Sports and politics have the same kind of entertainment value: high-flying emotions, controversies, rabid fans, widespread news coverage, the thrill of victory and the agony of defeat. The Red Sox won the World Series last night in a ho-hum game against the Cardinals who seemed not even to have the energy to pretend to care. To have won the whole thing is exciting, yet ultimately its importance is based on cultural hysteria and pseudo-civil religion rather than life and death issues. The election has been something else that I have been following with interest, and unfortunately, I have some of the same ho-hum feeling as I did watching last night's game. I honestly do not know who I am going to vote for, but have become numb to the whole swirl of sound bites, idealogues and talking heads. I know that this election is important...the world is a dangerous place, growing ever more dangerous each day. I worry about whether I should vote based on my security mom fears or my working class roots, my concerns about Supreme Court appointees or my worries about the marginalized and forgotten. I want to believe hopeful rhetoric, but am worried about being naive. I have been praying about my decision, but have no sure conviction of how to vote. I would like to have a celebration on Election Night, rejoicing that the man who has earned my trust is in the most powerful job in the world and my life and the world will be a better place. But who is that man and does it have any more significance than a baseball team achieving victory?

Lord, have mercy on this country and this election. Forgive us for our apathy and our arrogance. Forgive us for our disregard for You...Help us all to pray for our leaders and work towards a just and moral society.


Wednesday, October 27, 2004

Freedom of anonymity

I wonder now almost why I created this blog yesterday. It was a whim. My love was working late. I was watching the World Series and needed some additional intellectual distraction to pass my evening. I read about Real Live Preacher whose blog is being published in book form, clicked over to read it, loved his site, and googled my way into my own. Now I wonder how much personal information I want to share, because part of the draw is the anonymity and the unbridled freedom that provides to speak my mind, and part of me wants to be known...but not judged.

How often can I truly speak my mind and my heart? With my husband 98% of the time. With my mom...mostly. With my accountability partner...mostly. So often I am in the role of mentor, supervisor, spiritual guide or mom. These are not roles where I feel completely free to let down my guard. My life goal is to grow into the woman I was created to be, and seek to be the same person wherever I am, but there are...considerations. Politics. Evaluation. Judgments. The need to be the safe place to hide and not the one needing a safe place to hide.

The freedom of about the freedom to be known?

1 Corinthians 13:12 Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

Tuesday, October 26, 2004


My overriding spiritual concern is freedom these days. Living abundant life today. Not getting lost in meanness and petty disputes. Growing into the woman I was created to be. Leading others down the path to Jesus.

Not just spiritual freedom...although that is foundational. Also freedom from financial worries and other people's schedules. Freedom from materialism and freedom to be generous. Freedom to provide rich educational experiences to my children and freedom to invest in the marginalized. Freedom to make love with my husband in the middle of the afternoon and freedom to read in bed next to him while he murmurs sweet words in Spanish to me and then falls heavily to sleep.

Freedom to not care what anyone thinks of me but to treat other with empathy and respect. Freedom to pray hard, to think hard and to feel deeply. Freedom to be me.


Why blog?

Writing was my ambition as an elementary school student, and a creative life has always been my desire. Acting, writing, speaking, preaching, teaching, shepherding, mothering, loving my husband, homeschooling my kids, ministering to college students, following Jesus...all are attempts at a life of creativity...a reflection of the Creator God who made me. And so I decided to blog, in an attempt to carve out some free space in my busy life where I can express my thoughts in freedom and frankness.

Welcome to my random thoughts...

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